How can I use mindfulness for anger management?

Everyone gets angry and that's okay. How we experience anger and what we do when we're angry is something you can explore with mindfulness meditation so you can train to practice feeling anger with compassion and learn to get the timing right if you decide you need to speak to someone about it.

Mental noting is a kind of meditation that can be helpful to recognize and acknowledge anger — or any other emotion that comes up. Even just to know, "this is anger," when it happens is a big step. Once you identify anger in your mind, you can get curious and aware of your mental attitude about it. It's not so much about getting rid of the anger as checking it out with interest.

Meditation and mindfulness can help you explore ways to have an emotional experience and feel the physical sensations of it without fueling it and getting more distressed. For example with anger, try giving some gentle awareness to sensations like tension in the chest, a slight clenching of the fists or heat in the face, and other things that come with anger. Watching what's actually happening to your body in the here and now is usually more useful than running with the story in your head about what was said and done.

If the anger is frequent and intense, the classical antidote is to train your mind towards kindness and compassion. Here are some resources in the Happier meditation app:

For a quick start, watch this 3 minute Practice in Action video from Matthew, Downshifting from Anger.

Sharon Salzberg's Happier course 10% Nicer has lessons to practice self-compassion.

Oren Jay Sofer’s course Emotions has strategies for working with mindfulness for anger.

And in the Singles section of the app check out:

• Rage Relief | Jeff Warren
• Caring for Strong Emotions | Kaira Jewel Lingo
• A Skillful Response | Sharon Salzberg
• Transforming Anger | Jess Morey

Use the Search in the app to find more resources.

It's a great idea to check these out, find something that's working, and practice it regularly so you've got the 'muscle' built and the skill ready when anger or other strong emotions come up.